September 21, 2011
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QHP VI
1. I try not to let movie rants seep into my book rants, but this one I can’t help…
Why oh why oh why did they not cast Christian Coulson as the elder Tom Riddle? He was twenty-six when he was playing a teenage prefect, for Goddess’s sake…surely, they could have had him play Voldemort when he came back to seek the Dark Arts professorship? The movie people broke a lot of hearts when they left Christian out—mine included. (I went through the whole book squealing over how they had to bring Christian back. Extremely disappointed that they didn’t!)2. Ginny is completely irrational when Ron gets mad at her when he and Harry discover her kissing Dean Thomas.
“If you went out and got a bit of snogging done yourself, you wouldn’t mind so much that everyone else does it!” Really, Ginny? What about those of us who aren’t fond of kissing and who don’t understand the point of “tongue wrestling”; much less what’s so sexy about it? You think me running out and awkwardly frenching some guy is going to make up for all my inadequacies? I think not!¹3. In chapter eighteen, Hermione says, “I’ve been right through the Restricted Section and even in the most horrible books…” On whose permission? Surely any professor granting permission to use the Restricted Section would want to know why before writing/signing a note to give to Madam Pince, so who granted permission and what excuse did Hermione use? Or is it fully acceptable for N.E.W.T.s students to use the Restricted Section and Jo just never told us?
(I seem to recall something in the first or second book about older students using the Restricted Section for research for classes like Advanced Defense Against the Dark Arts, but I don’t remember anything being said about those students being able to use the Restricted Section freely.)4. Chapter nineteen again demonstrates Jo’s difficulty with spatial perception—a topic that tends to drive Ashley over at PGG nuts. (Or make her laugh…I forget which.)
“No more than six at a time!” said Madam Pomfrey, hurrying out of her office.
“Hagrid makes six,” George pointed out.
“Oh…yes…” said Madam Pomfrey, who seemed to have been counting Hagrid as several people due to his vastness.
If Grawp is about sixteen feet tall and Hagrid is supposed to be taller than the average male, but shorter than Grawp…exactly how tall/wide does someone have to be before the infirmarian mistakes them for “several people”? Just curious…
5. Page 485: Slughorn calls Ron “Rupert”. I’m guessing that’s a “wink-nudge” to Rupert Grint, who plays Ron in the movies, because she could’ve had Slughorn call him “Randy” or “Raoul” or anything else.
6. “It’s a banned subject at Hogwarts…Dumbledore’s particularly fierce about it…” And who, at that point, gave a shit about what Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore thought? We know that Armando Dippet is headmaster when Tom Riddle is at school, because Jo mentions it in the second book. We also know that Dumbledore is not the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor, because at that time, Galatea Merrythought was just getting ready to retire. So what position is Dumbledore in that his thoughts about various topics have any bearing on the school? Deputy Headmaster? Without that information, Slughorn’s statement is confusing, almost anachronous.
7. “It’s me home…it’s bin me home since I was thirteen.” …you didn’t consider Hogwarts your home when you first started, Hagrid? You didn’t perhaps think it was the best thing to happen to you in your entire life, like so many others, and at least call it your second home?
8. At the beginning of chapter thirty, it says that Mrs. Finnegan had difficulty finding a bed in Hogsmeade. Why should that be a problem? It’s a time of crisis and tragedy and other students are being pulled out by the boatload….shouldn’t the rules be bent at least once, and McGonagall allow parents who want to attend the funeral to sleep in the empty beds? We know that Gryffindor, Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw all have at least one empty bed by the simple fact that it says the Patil twins and Zacharias Smith have been pulled…why couldn’t Mrs. Finnegan sleep in Parvati’s empty bed? You’d think that would make her even happier, being in the girls’ dorm of her son’s house!
More than that, there are probably at least a dozen unused classrooms all around the school…why couldn’t McGonagall magic up some sleeping bags and allow the parents to sleep there? That’s almost a better idea than allowing them to sleep in the empty dorm beds…it seems like less of a rules/privacy violation to me.9. Later in chapter thirty, it says that everyone was wearing their dress robes for Dumbledore’s funeral. Dress robes aren’t on the required clothing list and the only fancy dress event Hogwarts had in the previous five books was the Yule Ball. Who, therefore, actually has dress robes with them? Especially since you would think that the sixth and seventh years would’ve taken their dress robes home when they went home for Christmas that year, or when school let out for the summer. Even those who had them at home couldn’t get them back by owl in time, given how soon Dumbledore’s funeral was after his death.
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¹ For the record, I’ve kissed several guys, but never with tongue (despite the efforts of the recipient of my first kiss). I’ve had eleven years since my first kiss to try and think about/figure out why French kissing is so great and it still mystifies me.
